Perfectionism & Forgiveness
- Jul 31, 2018
- 4 min read
I debated about this post. I'm putting myself out on a limb and sharing some silly internal struggle. I'm feeling a bit introspective these days. Some of you might be looking for organization tips, which I will still be offering, but today I'm writing about the mental struggle of life for the modern mom. We all have the mental struggles. Since my profession is a Professional Organizer, I don't want to give off the impression that my life is SUPER- UBER organize! My life has it's "messy" times. I'm a real person with my own secrets :)!! My goal is to be a relatable person rather than the blogger that looks like she has it all together. I think it's much easier to relate to another human if we share some of the same struggles. Personally, I will open up more to someone easily if I know they have walked the same path as me. I'm sure you all would agree.
The struggle has been inside of me for quite a while. My journey to begin eliminating the struggle began in January. I decided to invest in some help (Self Coaching Scholars- The Life Coach School- Brooke Castillo) from a life coach to rid me of the silly mental chatter that I have. The reason being is because I really want to use the energy my brain spends harassing me, to clear it up, and spend that energy being productive and, I guess, happier. I'm already happy, but there is always room for more happiness!
In Self Coaching Scholars (SCS), this months topic is "Your Past". Within the work, we don't spend time reliving the story of our past, rather we release it, look forward, and become future focused and become our own future self's mentor. Basically, I imagine myself as a successful me in the future and give myself advice from the perspective of that future person.
To change yourself... you must change... do the work... no more excuses and using the past to define your future!
Well, as you might have guessed because of the title of this post, my "struggle" has been perfectionism. I know you might be confused because one of my tag lines here at Sweet and Neat is "Done is Better Than Perfect" (which I really do live by, but a lot of my irks about myself is that tasks aren't done to perfection). Here's an example:
Throwing an AMAZING party. 100% successful. Everyone is happy and grateful. Yet, all I can do is find what went wrong! Lesson to myself: Gratitude!
YES, I want things in order, I want things put away in their proper home. I want my home to look a certain way. I want to feel productive. I want to have drank 8- 8oz. of water. I want to eat clean. I want to sleep for 8 hours. I want to not be impatient with my loved ones. I have always wanted these things and there is nothing wrong with that. These goals actually make me happy. I just can't beat myself up if I don't attain them EVERY DAY!
I love to wake up in the morning and walk downstairs into the kitchen and it's clean and tidy. I love making my bed. I love folding the blankets that adorn the couch and fluffing the pillows. I love having my laundry put away (my drawers aren't perfect, but at least things are put away!) This part of me is what makes me a great organizer. So, I have to love that part of myself and share that with others. BUT!!!, I can't get upset with others (i.e. my family) if those things don't matter to them.
for·give·ness
ˌfərˈɡivnəs/
noun
the action or process of forgiving or being forgiven.
I don't want to bore anyone, but I could really air my grievances here, but that will only prevent me from moving forward. And that is where forgiveness comes into play. My work for myself is to practice GRATITUDE and FORGIVENESS. Gratitude for where I am at in my life today. Forgiveness in the sense that I'm ok with the path I've been on in life. I'm NOT going to spend time forgiving EVERYTHING I did wrong. I will be grateful for every moment in my life, because without all of those "mistakes" I wouldn't be the person I am today!
Don’t let getting things done perfectly stop you from GETTING THINGS DONE!
When it comes to getting your house and my house ready with systems, routines and decluttering, I’m a practical organizer. I love to repurpose items in a home. It may not be Pinterest worthy but it’ll do the job. Not that that style defines me, because I CERTAINLY do love to do organization projects for myself and clients that ARE Pinterest worthy and aim for something close to perfect :)! I will not beat myself up if it's not perfect! I'll keep working to do the best I can and focus on the future.
I'd love to hear any of your struggles. I'd love to hear how you forgive yourself. Please leave a comment.
Start Where Your Are. Use What You Have. Do What You Can.
- Arthur Ashe
As Always, Keep it Sweet and Neat!
Stephanie
*FB Live Q&A Tuesdays @ 11 am on my Sweet and Neat Organizing page.
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photo credit: Bari Tessler
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